Knee Jerk

I had an interesting pt on Sat.
These are his x-rays. Dislocated knee.
They choppered him out to a bigger facility with an ortho surgeon .
Sorry about the dusty images. I guess I need to dust out my scanner.

This pt, a 26 y/o guy, was found sitting beside the highway, in the middle of nowhere, without a car, at Midnight in -10F degree weather. A good samaritan stopped, picked him up and brought him to the ER.

The cops called her a 'good samaritan', but personally I think she, a 40 y/o woman, was crazy. This kid was covered in blood. He had scalp lacerations and there was blood all over his face and hands. Maybe stop and call 911, but he could have been an axe murderer (he looked like one).

The pt claims he was driving, but he doesn't remember where his car is or if he had an accident. And he wasn't drinking! He can't remember anything, but he's positive he wasn't drinking.

Right.

This is the imaginary one sided conversation I have with him:

So you weren't drinking? And that odoriferous odor leaking from your pores would be?
Oh, of course, Eau de Beer Bong.
That is a tempting scent.
I almost bought that for my grandma last year, the in-store sample was enticing, but I decided to stick with plain old lavender perfume.
I know, it's so boring and plain!
Not at all like your aroma.
But oh, well, we can't have grandma getting kicked out of Thursday bridge, because she caused rampant alcoholism to break out at the senior citizen center!